It can be tempting to use a chronic illness as a shield, but what happens when you choose participation over avoidance? For a long time, Justin found himself caught in the “blame game,” using Crohn’s disease as a “get out of jail free card” to excuse everyday challenges like oversleeping or missing college deadlines. This avoidance ultimately led to a mindset where he felt less capable in school, life, and his relationships because of his IBD. At our Spring 2026 Live Online Community Conference, Justin spoke about his realization that to move forward, he needed to stop blaming a part of himself he couldn’t change. Instead, he chose to get involved with ImproveCareNow and the Patient Advisory Council (PAC), who helped Justin transform into a motivated and outgoing advocate. Through this active participation and his choice to help others, he discovered just how capable he truly is, finding success both as a PAC Co-Chair and in his collegiate endeavors. His #IgniteTalk is a powerful reminder that while we cannot change an IBD diagnosis, choosing to put away the blame game can help us realize our true potential.
Be inspired by Justin’s #IgniteTalk 🔥
For the longest time, I blamed a lot of my problems on Crohn’s disease. In fact, pretty much all of my problems. I mean, seriously, I used to blame not being able to wake up for my classes, mind you, at 10am, on Crohn’s. And this is in college by the way. So, this is actually not some funny business.
But what really stuck out was this one night from last semester that I remember a little bit too well. You see, it was 2am, I had just been hitting it off playing [a game called] Jackbox with a couple friends, and I had forgotten I had a paper due early the next day. So, I put all distractions aside, dragged myself to the corner table, and I began to write.
You see, I began to write and write an email. It went something like this: “Dear Professor, I apologize for the late email – and this is in short – I cannot submit my paper because I am having bowel issues from food I had earlier this day. Please let me submit it later.” I actually ordered late night fast food right after, jumped back on the couch, and let me tell you, it was one of the best nights ever.
So now, at this point, you’re probably wondering, “What in the world was this guy doing?” But I want you to stay with me now. So, my gracious professor allowed me to turn it in late, without penalty. But hitting that “submit” button, it left me guilty. Because in all seriousness, I remember thinking to myself, “Justin…really?!”
And at the time, it all felt like a joke. Granted, this isn’t the same experience for everyone, but I was reminded of how I used to joke about how I was guilty of using my condition as a get out of jail free card. And unfortunately, that joke became a very real mindset.
A very real and wrong mindset.
And that’s because I began to blame almost all of my problems on Crohn’s disease. Again, from not being able to wake up, to not being able to submit a paper on time, to things as serious as my relationship with friends and my relationships with family.
And so it came to a point where it culminated into, I think, one question I want you to also ask yourselves today: Who am I to blame?
Who am I to blame a part of me I can’t change?
Who am I to blame Crohn’s – or whatever it may be – for the challenges in life when life in of itself is about overcoming and adapting?
In my case, I was at a standstill. It was time for me to make a choice. I think it’s better if I tell you what happened. Because actually, I continued to develop a mindset that I was always going to be less capable.
Less capable in school than everyone else.
Less capable in life than everyone else.
Less capable in my relationships than everyone else.
Less capable because of Crohn’s.
And, quite frankly, it took me until the start of this year for me to finally concede in that blame game I am telling you today. By no means was it easy at first, but here’s what I found.
Because if there’s one thing we all have here in common, it’s the capability to learn.
And for me, I chose to learn to live with Crohn’s.
I chose to learn to love myself.
And here’s the hard truth. There are people out there with infinitely worse problems and conditions than you and I do, and they have success stories like you and I do. And, here’s mine. I became an advocate for other people. It was when I joined the greater ICN community and specifically the PAC that I learned to live, laugh and love with Crohn’s. You see, the PAC helped and saw me transform from actually a very shy and quiet kid having his internal struggles with Crohn’s to the person you see here today – an outgoing and motivated person.
I would’ve never imagined that I would be an advocate. I now compete and have awarded in collegiate-level mock trials as a first year. Actually, the other week, I was asked and juried for a graduate level trial course at our law school. If anything, when I put away the blame game, I found the room to become more capable.
Alright and here’s where I give my absolutely shameless plug to every single person in the PAC, my fellow Co-Chair Elizabeth, Chris, Favour, Rachel, Kendra, even my mom who’s watching, everyone because quite frankly, I couldn’t and wouldn’t be here talking about my success story without them. I wouldn’t have joined the PAC, I wouldn’t have found my home and purpose living with Crohn’s. And if it hadn’t for everyone along the way who advocated for me when I wasn’t able to do it for myself, I wouldn’t be here doing that again.
And if there’s one thing I learned from my time and journey with them all, it’s to really remember who is really in control. Because who are you to blame when you have the control? You see, don’t be discouraged by the problems that you have that you forget who is really in control.
Now, before I close, I want you all to remember that we’re in this game of life together. I may just be a college kid, but we’re in this journey of growth and each one of us has a unique story of who we are, who we want to be, and let’s be honest, we just do not have the time for the blame game!
Anyways have a great online spring community conference y’all.
Thank you.
Want more 🔥 ignite in your life? Find our fabulous Ignite Talks from patients, parents & clinicians 💚💙
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